I am 42 years old and have been married for 19 years to the same women, I have in the past said to her that I don't love her anymore. We have been to counseling and that worked great for her, but I faked it through the whole process. I didn't want to say anything that would hurt her, and have successfully done that again anyway. I told her some things that I know I didn't mean, and wish I could take back. I do love her but she is on the defensive this time. I know I have to prove to her that I can change. I have started going to church and talking to a pastor, and going to Bible study classes, but what is true love.

You faked your way through counseling and now want her to believe that you have changed. Are you faking it with God too?

If you truly want things to work out, get back into counseling, be honest, and do it right this time.

I can't blame her for being on the defensive and it's going to take a lot of work on your part to prove yourself to her this time.