Dear Readers: I worked with this guy for over a year, and although we knew each other, we finally got to know one another earlier this year. Unfortunately after several emails, and meetings, he left the company (in Japan). And at this stage, we admitted our feelings for each other. I wasn't sure if he would write or stay in touch with me, but he did. He's kept up with writing me and now he's traveling in Europe for one year. Recently, he told me that he met up with an old flame that he was also friends with for almost ten years. He said," the nature of his life never seems to allow for more than that." So does that mean they were briefly together and no longer are? He wrote me the other day telling me where he is & last night said he'd be returning to Amsterdam. I have a feeling she's there. He said he's going to be busy and then shortly after will travel to another country. We already had a talk about our situation, but I don't know what to do. He can't promise me anything, as he'll be away for a year, and said if things happen, they happen. Would things be with us or with her? We're still in touch, but I won't hear from him for a while due to his travels. Should I feel suspicious or remotely jealous of his old flame? This guy and I really connected and when I talk to him, it feels like when I met my first boyfriend. I've caught myself feeling happy & smiling at all times. If you have any advice, I would like to hear some. Thanks.

He obviously is not ready for a permanent relationship by telling you that he can't promise you anything. His meeting an old flame doesn't necessarily mean that he is back with her, but he thinks enough of you to tell you that he did see her. Honesty and communication are the most important parts of a relationship whether it is a friendship or more. Acting suspicious and jealous will be the first thing to push him away from you and cause him to think twice about anything more than a friendship.

Stay happy and smiling but stay busy and allow him the freedom to find what he wants in his life. To try to push him into something before he is ready would always cause some stress between you. He has admitted feelings for you and does keep in touch, telling you honestly what is happening with him. Time will tell if things will be with you as a couple. In the meantime, keep your options open and keep yourself occupied with work and activities at home.