Dear Readers: I recently went to a family get together that I didn't want to go to because of my one 1st cousin that I haven't seen in 15 years. She came on to me and it was hard for me to say no to her back then. Now I am 36 and she is 34. This time she gave me a hug and told me that she missed me and she wanted to be with me. My heart wants to be with her too but I know that it's wrong. Even when I was married I didn't feel a physical and mental attraction like this. What should? Do I go with my heart? I am confused. Can you please help me?

In the early teens many changes are taking place within our bodies which causes reactions to situations that we don't understand. Sometimes if these feelings aren't resolved they can linger in the back of the mind forever. Some develop crushes on parents or teachers. Some develop feelings for siblings or other relatives.

Knowing that what happened 15 years ago was wrong is the first step to healing and putting it behind you. The best help that I can give you is to see a counselor and an attorney. The counselor can help you understand these feelings and the attorney will advise you as to whether or not a relationship with your first cousin is legal where you live.